There were a few things I had been thinking about writing over the past couple of weeks...
We had a very anxious adventure two weekends ago, as there was a horrible and mostly unexpected ice storm that hit Atlanta. Our power went out at about 3am early Sunday morning, which left us with no heat, no way to cook and no other access to the outside world. Our phone happened to go out too.
We would have been fine, except for our worry about Ms. Savannah. It continued to get colder inside our apartment, and we could snuggle under the comforter in our bed, but... Ms. Savannah is somewhat of a cover-kicker, and we tried to hold her to keep her warm.
It got to be too much, and we left. In search of others with electricity, I was painfully going through morning coffee withdrawal and by four in the afternoon, I was desperate. Relief was sought at the Barnes and Noble down the street, where there were apparently a lot of lost-power refugees, just wanting to be someplace warm.
Finally after getting my parents' advice, I called my friend Maura, who most thankfully had power, and generously offered us her home and anything else we needed. After arriving at her apartment, and settling down a bit, we discovered that our power had come back on, along with our phone and we could go home and sleep in our own beds.
This past weekend was another ice storm, but we managed to ride it out here, doing not much at all, and thankfully not losing our electricity and heat again.
. . . . .
So, that brings me to today. And the list have to write. See, I'm quitting smoking today, and I'm excited and terrified all at the same time.
Reasons To Quit:
· i want to live a long time and be healthy...
· i want to be a good mommy for Savannah, and be here for when she needs me for as long as i can...
· i want to be able to have another baby someday, and i'll never have a chance to be healthy enough if i don't quit now...
· my hands are raw from washing them all the time, so i don't touch Savannah after i smoke without doing that...
· it would lower my blood pressure and allow me more energy for me, or for keeping up with Savannah...
· i've seen what cancer can do, and i'm smart enough to take control of myself and my money...
Reasons Not To Quit:
· smoking makes me feel good, temporarily...
· i like smoking; and the whole procedure involved. inhaling, exhaling, blowing smoke...
· i love taking handfuls of money and lighting them on fire, as it's pretty close to what i do smoking the cigarettes...
· i don't look nearly as cool smoking as what i think i do...
· i don't want Savannah to ever remember me with a cigarette, let alone to ever be burned with one, or put one in her mouth...
· it's completely selfish and doesn't benefit anyone, especially not me...
· damn it, i like smoking, but i have no way of justifying it anymore...
So, that's about it... It's pretty clear to me. Wallace and Savannah alone are huge reasons to quit that I never had other times I've thought of quitting.
'Sted recently quit, and hasn't smoked for three weeks now. And I think that's fantastic... especially since cigarette prices in California are even higher than they are here. :o)
So, I'm happy and hopeful that I can do this. I'm glad I finally decided to quit and I hope that it won't be horribly painful.
Wish me luck, and I know I'm smart enough and love myself enough to quit for good.
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