December 12, 2000

scattered pieces

i'm feeling all oogly googly today, this week, this month, i think... very much not myself. and, i have no idea what my problem is. but, i do know that it's annoying the hell out of me.

i've been busy, and not. stressed out and not. happy and not. i feel like someone who knows better than i needs to pick up the scattered pieces of me and put them back together properly.

my parents came for thanksgiving, as well as my sister and nephew... and it was marvelous. i even managed to make a turkey dinner that didn't completely suck.

we were supposed to be going to florida for christmas, with my family. but, our plans changed at thanksgiving when we spoke to my parents. they had decided they couldn't really do it; so they invited us to come spend the holiday at their house in pennsylvania, instead.

the coolest bit of this whole holiday thing this year is the fact that wallace's company decided to give everyone the whole week or so off. the office will be closed, and no one has to use any vacation time. i was thrilled to learn that when he told me, because i've been sad every year he's had to work between, and when i had to work between also. so, it was an unexpected gift.

i'm glad to be going to pennsylvania again. after all, it's been over two years since we've been there. and, i really need a few sheetz hot dogs.

i'm hoping for some snow too. as wallace and i were talking last night, we both confessed that as much as we loved living here, we miss the snow.

i remember fondly chilly winter evenings in our last apartment, looking out the french doors, and out into the valley as the snow came down. it was beautiful, and i miss it.

and, i'm usually a big holiday freak. i decorate for everything. and, this year, i've hardly touched my decorations. i can't seem to get into the holiday spirit. and, it depresses me further and so on and so forth. blah.

but, today is an up kind of day, or at least it has been so far. i did a bunch of things last night, and all of this morning. i can even see the floor in our room once again, now that i did laundry and picked up the toys.

i'm hopeful this is the start of an upswing in my attitude towards things in general. and, i'm hoping that i'll be less scattered, each day as i go on. i just want to be comfortable in my own skin again.

Posted by lara at December 12, 2000 01:06 PM
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